Three's Company

Now that we're getting closer to meeting Baby, all the advice I've received since the beginning of my pregnancy is flooding the forefront of my brain. Breastfeeding will be tough.... I'll probably cry every day for the first 2 weeks....You won't get more than 2 hours of sleep a day, etc. All that good stuff. But what's really been resonating in my mind is how I'll miss being just P and I. I find myself missing him already, even when we're sitting on the same sofa watching TV. Very soon we will lose that time alone and I have a feeling it will be very hard for me to get used to. It's been just the two of us for eleven years!!! Now, Baby ,I don't want you to think I'm going to resent you and that I'm dreading your arrival. It's the exact opposite. I can hardly wait to meet the person who has been residing in me for the past few months. There isn't a day that goes by where I don't wonder about what you look like and just how much joy you will bring to our lives. The only way I know how to explain it is that I'm going to miss being just "two" the way you would miss your old hometown. It's like leaving your quaint and provincial burb to move to the big city. It's so exciting and new and filled with experiences that you could never have back home. You'll meet new people, try new things and fill your life with new memories. But in your heart, you will always miss home, no matter how simple and sheltered it was. It is a safe and familiar place.

Who knows. If you're lucky enough, you'll get to go back one day. I guess that would be when the kids leave the nest and it's just P and I again. Though I might not have appreciated our long courtship at the time, I'm so grateful for the past 11 years I had alone with P. Most people only get a couple of years alone together before they start a family. In those 11 years, we've become best friends, created many traditions and established a solid foundation for our growing family. We've also helped mold each other into the people we've become today. I always knew P would make an amazing father. From the beginning, he was patient, compassionate and very giving. I hope some of that has rubbed off on me.

Here's a 3D photo of Baby that the perinatologist gave us a few weeks back. Even though we have this, I still wonder what baby will look like. I've seen many 3D sonograms and, trust me, all the babies look the same. Although I will say that I think he has my chin and puffy eyelids.